Chapter 29 - All On You.

Chapter 29 :

“I’m really not in the mood right now so just please stop.” Nicki said walking back into the dining room with Drake right behind her. Drake had just gotten back from his mother’s house near the end of the night. He wanted to talk to her but she wasn’t interested.

“So you think that walking away from your problems is going to make the situation magically disappear? You need to talk to me. You have to stop the bratty behavior.”

“Can you stop? You’ve already pissed me off and you just walked through the door now you’re calling me names. So not necessary.”

“Oh I see. The truth is bothering you. You don’t want to hear the truth! Well listen, the truth is your road to freedom and not blockage while sitting in  destruction.”

She sighed. “This isn’t the time. I’m busy.”

“That’s your problem. You’re always busy. You need to make some time for other things. I’m not trying to hear that.”

“Well then don’t. I already asked you to stop so hush your mouth and go away.”

He walked to her and grabbed the dish out her hand, throwing it in the corner then sitting her on the counter. Her eyes enlarged. “What you’re not going to do is tell me where I can go or what I can do. I’ll do whatever I want WHEN I feel like it. Got that?”

“Was that necessary?”

“Is you trying to avoid me necessary?”

“Okay dammit you want to talk? Well let’s talk,” she hopped off the counter. “Talk about how you forgot about me? Let’s talk about how you don’t even seem to care? Yeah let’s talk about that.”

“That’s where you’re wrong-”

“So whatever you were doing was more important than what I needed you for? Okay.”

He extended his hand in the air. “Ah! Let me finish speaking. You know that I put you before everything. Don’t try that. That’s not even cool.”

“Alright bae I’m really not trying to argue with you. If you say so, then okay.”

“Uh huh.”

“Where are you coming from?”

“That’s ridiculous. If you weren’t being so ignorant earlier, you would have paid attention to me when I told you I was going over my mom’s house."

“Sure okay.”  

“Listen sometimes and you’d know answers.” 

“Okay go away. You’re pissing me off. Just go.” She continued to clean the dishes and clean up the glass trying not to think about it anymore. It was fazing her. She didn’t feel like arguing and knew it was unhealthy. He in another case wasn’t too worried about the situation anymore. He went to his room to lie down and watch TV. He knew that his reasoning was for a good cause even if she didn’t understand yet. She was hurt. She strived to understand but it wouldn’t click in her head. He wanted her to realize that he didn’t forget about her. It was a misunderstanding. She placed the cleaner back under the sink after closing the bottle. After washing her hands with cotton candy scented soap, she dried her hands and opened one of the side doors, letting the two puppies come out and roam around the house. They were calm and followed her quietly up the steps. She took a seat at the top of the steps and noticed his phone was flipped outside down, outside the door. He heard quiet assuming that she might have cleaned up and stayed downstairs, but she didn’t. She was sitting outside their door with her head against the wall at one point. While watching TV, his eyes attracted the dresser like a magnet. Sitting there was her phone. She never went anywhere without her phone. The barking of the two puppies faded into the air. It seemed closer than what he thought it was. Little did he know that all three of them were sitting outside the door. Nicki was sitting there with her forearms on her legs and her hands holding her face. The thoughts she was trying to avoid took over. She grew angry thinking about it. It took over her actions. He got up from the bed, grabbing her phone. When in the room, he had calmed down and figured that yelling and being upset was not right. He was wondering if his touch would ease her mind since she wasn’t too mad about it. Quietly, he opened the door crept behind her putting his arms around her back, but not all the way. He stopped as if he were putting pressure on her lower back. She jumped out of her skin, looking back when she felt him. “You freaking—what are you doing? Why are you touching me?”

“Oh so now you’re mad? We can let stuff go and move on, you know. I didn’t mean to speak with anger in my voice.”

“Why do you talk to me like you did nothing wrong? Why can’t you see that? I’m not happy.”

“I do see that. I’m still trying to talk you and I apologized but you still want to think about other stuff and it’s not true. It’s just like I can’t please you.”

“But you won’t tell me what you were doing? And you expect me to trust you?”

“You should trust me. I wasn’t doing anything wrong.”

“Okay. Whatever you say.”

“You need to say you trust me and mean it.”

“No. Stop it.”

“Stop what? Stop trying to make you realize and state the truth?”

“Stop. Just stop.” He grabbed her, making her face toward him and give her a hug. “Stop… you smell like perfume!  Who were you out there hugging? Or was it more? You were screwing weren’t you?” she snatched away from him.

“Screwing? You’re the only one I’ve screwed since I married you. You know this. I probably smell like that because of my mom. It rubbed on my sweater when I HUGGED her. Calm down. Wasn’t anyone out there messing around.” She heard his phone vibrate, but he didn’t. She turned her head and pointed to his phone and tapped him with her other hand. 


“Your girlfriend is texting you. You might want to get that so you don’t have two women mad at you.”

“You’re too funny to really think I was out messing around on you.” He laughed hysterically throwing his head back. “That’s the silliest thing I have ever heard.” He grabbed his phone and took a look at it. After making sure it was not a business call, he pushed it really close to her face to show her that nothing was wrong.

“No,” she said forcing his hand back to the rest of him. “Get that out my face.” She was becoming more emotional than she was upset.

“You don’t want to look because you know I’m not doing shit.”

“No, you’re just trying to make me mad. I hate you.”

“Why would I try to make you mad? And you don’t hate me; stop that.”

“Yes I do.”

“Okay. I’ll let you sit in your ‘hatred’ then.” He kissed her cheek only for her to wipe it off, and went back in his room shutting the door. She curled up on the floor while a million thoughts ran through her mind like a marathon. The first two tears were about to release from her eyes, but she blinked them away. More tears formed and rolled down her cheek but they couldn’t be stopped. She wasn’t about to sit there and act like nothing ever mattered when it did. Her head ached. She closed her eyes and tried to stop weeping. She tried for a good twenty minutes until she fell asleep with her forehead on the palm of her hand.

A good hour moved by when Drake got up to grab a bottle of Dasani. The mini fridge settled near the closet. In the process of making that happen, he questioned where she was. He hadn’t heard from her since he closed the door and left her in the hallway. Not even a sound of keys or a car driving away. Inaudibly, he discontinued in his tracks to observe the setting. It was noiseless. He threw the water on the bed and paced away from it opening the door. The door slowly crept open. She was laying there, still nestling herself. He stooped low from behind her moving some hair out of the way to see her face. The purity displayed on her face. He knew she was silently hurting and he wanted to make it better. He sat there and waited for her to wake up. Her body tossed abducently. There was no sunlight to wake her up. She opened her eyes moaning as she stretched and rolled over to see him sitting there watching her. She covered her mouth until the yawn was finished. He intently watched her not saying a word at first. Once she saw him, she really didn’t have much to say. Her eyes watched him to. She yawned once more sitting up and pressing her back against the wall. “Are you okay?”  he asked watching her yawn again. She swiped her hands across her eyes and nodded. “You look tired. Maybe you should go and lay down. I’ll run you a bath to soak in.”

“No…”

“Let me hold you.”

“No.”

“Why?”

“I’m fragile.”

“So why don’t you go lay down? You’re feisty.”

“I’ll get up when I’m ready to okay? I don’t feel like moving.”

“Okay,” he shrugged.” He and she sat there not saying anything. Nicki would look down at her clothes and play with them but Drake’s eyes were stuck like glue. She could feel him staring at her but it came to a point where she wanted him to stop. She roamed her hand around and picked up his phone handing it to him. He took his phone and sat in back on the floor. She rolled eyes while getting up, going into their room heading to the bathroom. He got up seconds later picking up both their phones and went into the room, locking the door. He reached his bed and leaned against it waiting. She came back out with some sweat pants on. She walked over to her side and laid down. He climbed in the bed and continued watching the TV. She took the two large pillows on the bed and propped herself up, liable to see everything. Whatever he was watching was causing him to laugh. He was loud. She looked over to see what he was watching then turned back around shaking her head. He continued his loud laughter before turning the TV down and looking in her direction. She was staring at the out the window, longing for something. When he looked in her direction to check on her, he saw this. He was only trying to comfort her and make her feel better. “Why don’t you come here and let me hold you?  You look lonely. You need some loving.”

She sighed and put her head back. “No.” As the night passed, the trees swayed, bellowing in the air. The moon rested in the same spot it usually rested in. It was a Half moon.

Nicki got up from the bed and walked in the direction of the bathroom. She pulled one of her favorite scented soaps from the cabinet and went over to the shower. It was a brown sugar bottle. She undressed the stepped in the shower, playing around with the temperature levels. When she got it to where she liked it, she leaned against the shower wall, closing her eyes. She allowed the water to relax her muscles and calm her nerves. Her mind was stuck on something. She was trying to do everything within her power to make it cease. The shower water blended in with her tears. Once again her emotions were getting the best of her. Lifelessly, she grabbed her sponge and soap and bubbled up her body, letting the soap sit on her skin and marinate. Her eyes closed. She allowed the water to hit her skin and rinse the soap. She shrieked as a pain shot in her stomach causing her to bend over. Her body was forced to the wall as she opened her eyes. After turning the water off, she grabbed her towel, wrapped herself in it then sat on the sink. The moments passed as the pain went away. She stood up and walked into the closet to find some clothes. The closet full of clothes seemed to debate on whether which clothes she should wear. She picked up some leggings and a hoodie then stood there and got dressed. Walking back to her bed, her attention was focused on how good she smelled. A pensive expression came to her face as she laid herself down and curled up next to her pillow. He glanced into her eyes. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

“So you were crying for no reason?”

“I’m okay."

 He heard her stomach growling. She placed her hand over her abdomen. “Your stomach…you’re hungry. Want me to fix you something?”

“No.” She laid still. Her stomach continuously growled. He looked at her still giving her that reassuring look.

“Look boo, I don’t know what you want me to do. You’re not even cooperating with me. I’m being nice and look what you’re giving me.”

“I just don’t feel good and I don’t want to be bothered.”

“Are you going to kick me out too?”

“No.”

She hopped up when she heard a car pulling up. The music was banging. She looked out the window to see it was Safaree. He parked his car and went up to her door. She was near the end of the steps when he knocked. She pulled the door open. Of course he was iced out and wearing sun glasses at night. A Coon. She stepped to the side so he could come in. He saw that she looked a little drowsy and her eyes just a bit red. “What’s wrong with you?” he asked.

“Um, nothing?”

“You sure?”

“Yes! What brings you by?”

“Oh nothing. Just riding around like a BC.”

“Oh okay. Where you been?”

“I had business to take of, that’s it.”

“Okey doke."

“Yo Drizzy here?”

“Yes…”

“Oh where? Let me say hi.”

“He doesn’t—he’s busy.”

“Oh well say hi to him for me.”

“No.”

“Why?”

“Why when you can do it for yourself!”

“But you just said he was busy.”

“Oh well,” she shrugged.

“What is wrong with you?”

“I said nothing.”

“Something. I’ll know soon.” She puckered her lips and shook her head as if she didn’t have much interest. “Well this Coon is out. See ya.”

“Okay bye. Thank you for checking on me.” She closed the door and headed straight for the fridge to get something to drink. She grabbed a bottle of Gatorade then went back upstairs. Drake was still sitting there unbothered with the TV low. His hands were on his lap. He observed. She climbed into the bed. “Who was that?” Drake questioned.

“S.B.”

Her body was facing the ceiling. One of her hands rested on her tummy. He focused on her now, watching her eyes flutter closed. “You know you shouldn’t turn away without saying good night. I suppose you were going to fall asleep too.” Words formed in her mouth but didn’t come out. She rolled over to her side closing her eyes but not going to sleep. She was thinking about what he was possibly thinking of. He couldn’t help himself. She was still acting nonchalant and independent.

Having the urge to touch her, he tried to wrap his arm around her thinking she was sleep. She wasn’t. She pushed his arm away. He sat up to be more fluent. “Don’t push me away. I’m trying to hold you.”

“No!”

“Yes!”

“Nooo, stop!”

“Why? Give me a reason I shouldn’t hold my own wife. Why are you acting like this?”

“Please stop it.”

“Nope,” he said attempting again. This particular time, he managed to roll over her so he could face her. He got one arm behind her head and the other arm going across her arm and on her back while she punched and pushed him. She wiggled to get out of his grip. Nothing helped her. The tears formed in her eyes again. “Can you let go of me? Please. I don’t want you to touch me.” The drips came down her face and onto the sheets. He took his hand and wiped the tears off her face. She moved her face letting him know she didn’t want him touching her face. “Stop it!”

“Go to sleep,” he said pulling up the covers and rubbing her back. “You’ll be okay,” he added. She stared off into the corner of the room. Lightly, she was still trying to get away from him. He didn’t give in. Her trying to wiggle and escape only made him hold her tighter. She finally gave up and laid there. He kissed her forehead softly and let the night end.

I wasn't going to post this but I re wrote it out of boredom.Tell me what you think :(. Oh! And I know there's one question that is going to be left unanswered. But, this is not over. Read on.


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The next evening, Nicki was on her way back in her bedroom, talking on the phone with Trina. She was home half the day doing nothing. “Nicki girl! Why you sound like that? You hardly talking girl!”

“Just thinking.”

“Sounds like you have a lot of luggage on your plane. Are you feeling okay?”

“I’m okay Trina. What’s up with you?”

“I don’t know what to say. You know, shows, interviews and stuff like that.”

“Yes I understand. How was your show in Dallas?”

“It was bananas girl! I need to bring you with me.”

Nicki smirked. “Yeah, that sounds good.”

“Hey Nicki?”

“Yes?”

“You know I’m not stupid right? I know something’s wrong. Just tell me.”

“Drake…he didn’t come last night.”

“You’re sad because he didn’t cum? It’s not his fault Nicki.  Sex is not always 

ea-“

“TRINA!” Nicki yelled laughing. “I meant come as in attend. But he thinks there’s nothing wrong or whatever. I don’t know girl.”

“He didn’t tell you why?”

“No. He won’t tell me so I’m not going to beg.”

“You need to ask him again.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

“Stop. I said no.”

“Girl you stubborn!”

“No you didn’t just call me that. Drake told me that last night. I can’t deal with this right now. I’m still upset.”

“You need a break! You need to go out and have fun.”

“I don’t have time for that. I don’t feel like doing anything.”

“I’m coming out there and kidnapping you.”

“No you won’t.”

“Yes I will! You need to listen to Drake! And you need to listen to me! Stop being stubborn Nicki.”

“No.”

“Alright then.”

“I love you Trina! I’ll see you when you come and kidnap me,” they both laughed.

“That’s right girl! Be prepared. Talk to you later.”

“Okay.” Nicki sat still hearing someone come through the front door.

“Oh and Nick, listen to Drake!”

“No.” she stated before hanging up. Nicki sat there and thought. She didn’t want to so she wasn’t going to act.

Drake came in their room and said hello, but a response was unheard. He shook it off thinking he was speaking too low. He was in their closet looking through stuff. He didn’t think anything would be wrong, especially since he wasn’t in the house for that long. She had two upcoming events and he wanted to know more about them and make sure that he didn’t misdate them. “Nicki,” he called for the first time. She was sitting on the bed looking at the TV which was in his direction. He stopped and came out a little to make sure she heard him. “Nic, do you hear me?” Her head averted to the covers on the bed, looking downwards. The conversation he had earlier came back into his head.

“Drizzay! What’s up man?” Wayne said with the cigar hanging out his mouth.

“Nothing. How you living?”

“Living the good life bruh. You by yourself today captain?”

“That’s good man and yeah. Where’s Lauren? How’s the kid?”

“She went back home two days ago.”

“Is that so? I thought she wasn’t leaving until this week.”

“Man, she wasn’t but her mama missed Cameron, so she gone.”

“Oh…don’t want any problems with her mama. Better send that child home.”

“Chea. I don’t want any parts of that. Where the Queen at though?”

“At home I suppose…”

“What you mean you suppose, nigga? Did you not just see her last night?”

“Yes. I’m saying if she didn’t leave out.”

“Okay bro. Why you sounding like that? Everything good?”

“Eh,” Drake said fixing his face.

“Spill it to me.”

“I don’t know man. She…upset with me because, you know, I didn’t go-“

“Yeah.”

“So now she barely even talks to me. All she says is ‘No’ and she won’t let me touch her or anything and she started crying last night when I was trying to hold her. I had to like, squeeze her to stop moving. We were fine talking all calm but when she woke up from her nap, she was just a meanie. She told me she hated me and she thinks I was out messing around. I still believe that something is bothering her a little.”

“Damn man. That’s crazy! That ain’t like her to push away. Had a rough night I see. You weren’t though, right?”

“Hell no I wasn’t out with them thirsty hoes. You shouldn't even have to ask me that.”

“Well she needs the tongue bro. She’s hormonal.”

“Right! That’s what I’m saying but she won’t even let me hold her.”

“What you need to do is tie her down man. There’s no way she could be disappointed with that.”

“Aright man,” he said punching his fist into his other hand. “Thanks.”

He threw the jacket that he had in his hand and climbed up on the bed. “LOOK ONIKA, I’VE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS SHIT! YOU’RE NOT GOING TO KEEP BEING RUDE AND RIDICULOUS. THE LAST THING YOU WILL DO IS IGNORE ME WHEN I’M SPEAKING TO YOU. I DON’T KNOW WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU BUT YOU NEED TO GET OVER IT. I HAVE SOME SERIOUS BUSINESS TO TAKE CARE OF AND I COME BACK AND GET THIS!?” He hoped off the bed and went back to the closet. The jacket that was on the floor was picked up and he hung back up, leaving the room and closing the door with force. The sadness showed in her face. She didn’t mean for that to happen. This was one of the first times that he was so angry. And angry at her, at that.


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“Hey Nicki. I was just calling to make sure everything was okay. Aubrey told me about the other day. You okay?” Mama Sandi asked.

“Hi Momma. Thank you for calling me.”

“No Problem. Are y’all doing okay now?”

“Not exactly. He’s a little mad at me.”

“Aw! What happened?”

“Well he came home last night and was talking to me but I didn’t feel like talking so I didn’t answer him. He got in my face and yelled at me then he went and slept in another room.”

“He was in your face? Yelling? Aubrey?”

“I’m just as shocked as you are.”

“Is he there right now?”

“Yes I think he’s in the basement.”

“Oh my goodness Nicki. I am going to talk to him. I’m so disappointed that he did that to you. I’m sorry.”

“No it’s okay. I deserved it.”

“I have no tolerance for that. I’ll um, talk to you later. Take care of yourself. I love you.”

“Okay momma. Thank you and I love you too. Bye.”

After getting off the phone with Mama Sandi, Nicki felt bad for the way she was acting so she wanted to go and make things better. She got up and started to the basement but heard Drake on the phone so she knew he was on the phone with his mom. She waited at the top until he was done talking. He grunted, signifying that he was done. She could tell he was mad but that's why she wanted to make her move. Her feet hit the steps and she went down the steps. Drake was standing about to walk over to his seat when he saw her come down. "Babe," she called.

“Yeah? What? You want to talk now?”

“Please.”

“Okay,” he said sitting down. “Come and sit.” She crossed her foot from over the other and sat next to him. They stared at each other, with some compassion. Nicki half smiled. He waited for her to speak.

“Listen, I know I’ve been acting bitchy. I’m sorry for acting like that and I’m sorry for ignoring and not trusting you. I really did want to but I don’t know. I just wasn’t feeling good inside to come and say it.”

“You remember what I told you? It still applies and always will. I knew what was wrong with you but I was doing my best not to hold it against you.”

“I know babe. I wasn’t the easiest to deal with. I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay. I didn’t mean to scream in your face either.”

“Okay. Can I have a hug?”

“Of course you can. Come here. You will finally let me hold you without trying to escape me eh,” they both giggled.

So you thought this is really what went down? You're wrong :).

“I’m really not in the mood right now so just please stop,” Nicki said walking back into the dining room with Drake right behind her. Drake had just gotten back from his mother’s house. He wanted to talk to her but she didn’t want to talk to him.

“You need to talk to me. You can’t keep walking away from problems like this.”

“No.”

“Life is what you make it and you're making this really difficult right now.”

“Why do you always say that? I’m very upset and I don’t give a damn so leave it alone. Stop talking to me. That's it.”

“No I’m not leaving it alone. Why are you trying avoid me? Nah, this isn't going to work.”

“Oh my gosh. What do you want? Can you stop badgering me? I don’t want to talk to you right now. Leave me alone.”

“The least you can do is talk about so we can resolve this. How are you going to ask me what I want then tell me to leave you alone? When was there room for me to tell you? I hate when you put things off. Making shit worse.”

“Talk about how you forgot about me? Talk about how you don’t even seem to care? Yeah let’s talk about that.”

“I didn’t forget about you. Keep assuming stuff. You really don’t know the deal.”

“So whatever you were doing was more important than what I needed you for? Okay.”

“You know that I put you before everything. Don’t try that. That’s not even cool.”

“If you say so. Okay then.”

“Okay,” he said with no problem.

“And where did you just come from?”

“I told you this morning that I was going over my mom’s house. Don’t play stupid with me. I didn’t go anywhere else than what I told you.”

“Sure okay.”

“Listen sometimes.”

“Go away please.” She continued to clean the house, trying not to think about it anymore. It was fazing her. She didn’t feel like arguing and knew it was unhealthy. He in another case wasn’t too worried about the situation. He went to his room to lie down and watch TV. He knew that his reasoning was for a good cause even if she didn’t understand yet. She was hurt. She strived to understand but it wouldn’t click in her head. He wanted her to realize that he didn’t forget about her. It was a misunderstanding. She placed the cleaner back under the sink after closing the bottle. After washing her hands with cotton candy scented soap, she dried her hands and opened the door, letting the two puppies come out and roam around the house. They were calm and followed her, quietly up the steps. She took a seat at the top of the steps and noticed his phone was flipped outside down, outside the door. He heard quiet assuming that she might have cleaned up left out, but she didn’t. She was actually sitting outside there with her head against the wall at one point. While watching TV, his eyes attracted the dresser like a magnet. Sitting there was her phone. She never went anywhere without her phone. The barking of the two puppies faded into the air. It seemed closer than what he thought it was. Little did he know that all three of them were sitting outside the door. Nicki was sitting there with her forearms on her legs and her hands holding her face. He got up from the bed, grabbing her phone. He was wondering if his touch would ease her mind. Quietly, he opened the door crept behind her putting his arms around her back, but not all the way. He stopped as if he were putting pressure on her lower back. She jumped out of her skin, looking back when she felt him. “You freaking—what are you doing? Why are you touching me?”

“So we’re still acting like that, huh? We don’t know how to let things go and move on?”

“No,” she started. “I’m still very upset, Aubrey. Why do you keep bothering me thinking that you did nothing wrong? Why can’t you see that?”

“I do see that. I’m still trying to talk you and I apologized but you still want to think about other stuff and it’s not true. It’s just like I can’t please you.”

“But you won’t tell me what you were doing? And you expect me to trust you?”

“You should trust me. I wasn’t doing anything wrong.”

“Okay. Whatever you say.”

“You need to say you trust me and mean it.”

“No. Stop it.”

“Stop what? Stop trying to make you realize and state the truth?”

“Stop. Just stop.” Finishing her sentence, he starting humming blocking out what she had to say. She heard his phone vibrate, but he didn’t. She turned her head and pointed to his phone and tapped him with her other hand. “Your girlfriend is calling or texting you. You might want to get that so you don’t have two women mad at you.”

“Oh so this is what you thinking? You really think I was out messing around on you?” he laughed hysterically throwing his head back. “That’s the silliest thing I have ever heard.” He grabbed his phone and took a look at it. After making sure it was not a business call, he pushed it really close to her face to show her that nothing was wrong.

“No,” she said forcing his hand back to the rest of him. “Get that out my face.”

“You don’t want to look because you know I’m not doing shit.”

“No, you’re just trying to make me mad. I hate you.”

“I would never try and make you mad. And you don’t hate me. Stop that.”

“Yes I do.”

“Okay. I’ll let you sit in your ‘hatred’ then.” He kissed her cheek only for her to wipe it off, and went back in his room shutting the door. She curled up on the floor while a million thoughts ran through her mind like a marathon. The first two tears were about to release from her eyes, but she blinked them away. More tears formed and rolled down her cheek but they couldn’t be stopped. She wasn’t about to sit there and act like nothing ever mattered when it did. Her head ached. She closed her eyes and tried to stop weeping. She tried for a good twenty minutes until she fell asleep with her forehead on the palm of her hand.

No more than then forty minutes later, Drake got up to grab a bottle of Dasani. The mini fridge settled near the closet. In the process of making that happen, he questioned where she was. He hadn’t heard from her since he closed the door and left her in the hallway. Not even a sound of keys or a car driving away. Inaudibly, he discontinued in his tracks to observe the setting. It was noiseless. He threw the water on the bed and paced over to the bed, opening the door. She was laying there, still nestling herself. He stooped low from behind her moving some hair out of the way to see her face. The purity displayed on her face. He knew she was silently hurting and wanted to make it better. He sat there and waited for her to wake up.

There was no sunlight to wake her up. She opened her eyes moaning as she stretched and rolled over to see him sitting there watching her. She covered her mouth until the yawn was finished. He intently watched her not saying a word at first. Once she saw him, she really didn’t have much to say either. She yawned once more sitting up. He grinned at her. “You look tired. Maybe you should go and lie down. I’ll run you a bath to soak in.”

“No…”

“Let me hold you.”

“No.”

“Why?”

“Leave me alone.”

“Aw, you still hate me?”

“Yes!”

“I still love you. I’ll never stop.”

“That’s nice…”

“Baby, let me hold you.”

“No. I rather you not touch me.”

“Why?”

“Because I said so...?”

“So why don’t you go lie down? You’re feisty.”

“I’ll get up when I’m ready to, aight?”

“Okay,” he shrugged.” He and she sat there not saying anything. Nicki would look down at her clothes and play with them but Drake’s eyes were stuck like glue. She could feel him staring at her but it came to a point where she wanted him to stop. She roamed her hand around and picked up his phone. 

“You can take a picture. Therefore you can stare at it whenever.” 

He took his phone and sat in back on the floor. She got up and went into their room, going to the bathroom. He got up seconds later picking up both their phones and went into the room, locking the door. He reached his bed and leaned against it waiting. She came back out with some sweat pants on. She walked over to her side and laid down. He climbed in the bed and continued to watch the TV. She took the two large pillows on the bed and propped herself up, liable to see everything. Whatever he was watching was causing him to laugh. He was loud. She looked over to see what he was watching then turned back around shaking her head. He continued his loud laughter before turning the TV down and looking in her direction. She was staring at the out the window, longing for something. When he looked in her direction to check on her, he saw this. “Why don’t you come here and let me hold you? You look lonely. You need some love.”

“No.”

“Can you please stop being so stubborn? You know you love me.”

“Leave me alone. I can’t even hear myself think.”

“What are you thinking about?” She didn’t answer him so the room was silent minus the fact that the TV was on. He heard her stomach growling. She placed her hand over her abdomen. “Your stomach…you’re hungry. Want me to fix you something?”

“No.” She laid still. Her stomach continuously growled. He looked at her still giving her that reassuring look. She picked up her phone off the table and scrolled down. She looked straight waiting to hear someone’s voice. “Hey Safaree. I need you to do me a favor. Yeah, I want McDonalds. I want a big ass burger with a large ass box of fries. Yup. Okay thanks.”

Drake shook his head. “I could have fixed you something better than that. Since when did you want to eat burgers and French fries?”

“Whatever I want, I get. Point blank.”

“Can you speak with a better tone?”

She sighed and put her head back. “No.”

As the night passed, the trees swayed, bellowing in the air. The moon rested in the same spot it usually rested in. Half moon. Nicki got up from the bed and walked in the direction of the bathroom. She pulled one of her favorite scented soaps from the cabinet and went over to the shower. It was a brown sugar bottle. She undressed the stepped in the shower, playing around with the temperature levels. When she got it to where she liked it, she leaned against the shower wall, closing her eyes. She allowed the water to relax her muscles and calm her nerves. Her mind was stuck on something. She was trying to do everything within her power to make it cease. The shower water blended in with her tears. Once again her emotions were getting the best of her. Lifelessly, she grabbed her sponge and soap and bubbled up her body, letting the soap sit on her skin and marinate. Her eyes closed. She allowed the water to hit her skin and rinse the soap. She shrieked as a pain shot in her stomach causing her to bend over. Her body was forced to the wall as she opened her eyes. After turning the water off, she grabbed her towel, wrapped herself in it then sat on the sink. The moments passed as the pain went away. She stood up and walked into the closet to find some clothes. The closet full of clothes seemed to debate on whether which clothes she should wear. She picked up some leggings and a hoodie then stood there and got dressed. Walking back to her bed, her attention was focused on how good she smelled. A pensive expression came to her face as she laid herself down and curled up next to her pillow.

She hopped up when she heard Safaree pulling up. His music was banging. He parked his car and went up to her door. She was near the end of the steps when he knocked. She pulled the door open. Of course he was iced out and wearing sun glasses at night. A Coon. She stepped to the side so he could come in. He saw that she looked a little drowsy and her eyes just a bit red. 

“What’s wrong with you?” he asked.

“Um, nothing?”

“You sure?”

“Yes!”

“Okay, here’s your big ass burger and fries.

She giggled. “Thank you.”

“Yup. Yo Drizzy here?”

“Yes…”

“Oh where? Let me say hi.”

“He doesn’t—he’s busy.”

“Oh well say hi to him for me.”

“No.”

“Why?”

“Because you can do it for yourself!”

“But you just said...” he pointed to the side.

“Oh well,” she shrugged.

“What is wrong with you?”

“I said nothing.”

“Something. I’ll know.” She puckered her lips and shook her head as if she didn’t have much interest. “Well this Coon is out. See ya.”

“Okay bye. Thank you.” She closed the door and headed straight for the fridge to get something to drink. She grabbed a bottle of Gatorade then went back upstairs. Drake was still sitting there unbothered with the TV low. His hands were on his lap. He observed. She climbed into the bed while munching on a fry. He went back to watching TV.

After she was done eating her junk, she disposed her trash and straightened herself out on the bed. Her body was facing the ceiling. One of her hands rested on her tummy. He focused on her now, watching her eyes flutter closed. “You know you shouldn't lie down after eating. I suppose you were going to sleep too.” Words formed in her mouth but didn't come out. She rolled over to her side closing her eyes but not going to sleep. She was thinking about what he was possibly thinking of. He couldn't help himself.

 Having the urge to touch her, he tried to wrap his arm around her thinking she was sleep. She wasn’t. She pushed his arm away. He sat up to be more fluent. “Don’t push me away. I’m trying to hold you.”

“No!”

“Yes!”

“Nooo, stop!”

“Why? Give me a reason I shouldn’t hold my own wife.”

“Please stop it.”

“Nope,” he said trying again. This particular time, he managed to roll over her so he could face her. He got one arm behind her head and the other arm going across her arm and on her back while she punched and pushed him. She wiggled to get out of his grip. Nothing helped her. The tears formed in her eyes again. “Can you let go of me? Please. I don’t want you to touch me.” The drips came down her face and onto the sheets. He took his hand and wiped the tears off her face. She moved her face letting him know she didn’t want him touching her face. “Stop it!”

“No, Onika. Go to sleep,” he said pulling up the covers and rubbing her back. “You’ll be okay,” he added. She stared off into the corner of the room. Lightly, she was still trying to get away from him. He didn’t give in. Her trying to wiggle and escape only made him hold her tighter. She finally gave up and laid there. He kissed her forehead softly and let the night end.

As soon as Drake got up a few hours later to start his day, he made himself aware of his wife's morning ritual. There was something called patience and he wanted to make sure she learned what it was.

So, he decided to wait in their bathroom until she got up--that was after he showered. While he sat there, he began to think hardly. No, he wasn't mad because he hadn't done anything wrong. At least that's what he thought but she thought otherwise. He felt she was being a bit truculent, but everyone makes mistakes. 

Nicki opened the bathroom door and saw him sitting there. She only got a quick glance at him before standing in front of the mirror while about to brush her teeth.

"Good morning," he said politely.

Her head turned and she stared at him for a few seconds. "Is it a good morning?" she asked.

"Yup."

"How do you figure?" she queried whilst grabbing her toothbrush and adding some paste. She stuck it in her mouth waiting for him to answer.

"Come here," he breathed grabbing her by the waist.

"Stop! You see my brushing my teeth!"

"So what," he argued back slamming her butt on his lap. "Listen, I need you to get dressed. I need to go somewhere and I'm taking you with me."

"No you're not. I have things to do."

"Not anymore."

"Yeah whatever, you'll see," she said getting up.

"Guess we will." 

Nicki made sure she brushed every cranny in her teeth before swishing up some water in her mouth and unloading it down the drain. She smiled quickly before moving on to some mouth wash.

"Babe, I'm not done with you," Drake reminded. Her body twisted around to his open arms.

"What is it?"

"Come back," he playfully pouted.

"Aubrey, what is it for real? I need to get myself together."

"I love you," he wooed perfectly with his head dropping. "Why you being so mean?"

She sighed slowly and looked into his fulgurant eyes. "Why are we doing this?"

"That's what I would like to know. Why are we doing this? We're suppose to love each other, listen to each other, be able to cut through the red tape and all that other good stuff. I don't want to be in the shade like this."

"Well what do you want me to do?"

"Listen," he told her softly.

"All right. Let me go and take a shower and do my stop then I'll listen. Deal?"

"Deal."

"Okay. Thank you."

"Anything for you," he smiled, exiting the bathroom.

Nicki continued to brush her teeth and wash her face. Since Drake had already showered, he got out of his house clothes and put on something more suitable for going out the house.

She wondered as she slapped some lotion on her legs. The way he had been acting was giving her second thoughts. It made her think about all the times he did stop anything he was doing for her. It was hard to think now all of a sudden he would stop doing that. When she was doing applying her lotion, perfume, and under garments, she threw on some black pants and a short sleeve shirt with vibrant designs. She grabbed her shoes and headed downstairs to see Drake watching the TV.

"You ready to go?" he asked.

"Yes."

He made sure everything was off, grabbed her hand, and locked the door behind them. Approaching the car, he unlocked it then opened the door for him. 

Silence was threatening. Sighs of consternation derived from the back of her throat had broke loose. The whole time Nicki had wondered the time that would begin would Drake would start talking and where exactly this man was taking her. He asked of her to listen and that's what she was doing. The only difference was he wasn't talking as she listened with full ears. It was almost like he was avoiding this talk that they needed to have.

"So are we going to talk?"

"We'll cross that bridge when we come to it." His side grin produced one on her face.

"Whatever you say, sir."
Forty minutes was a long time for Nicki. She awoke roughly taking her head from under the seat belt and looked out the window. They were sitting at a light. She popped her head up slowly and looked to her left. Drake was having hand gestures to the music he was playing. 

Not long after, he pulled into a parking lot of the mall and parked. 

"Hey, what's going on? You could have warned me about my clothes and stuff if you were going to bring me here."

"Sweet lips, it's cool. Just come with me."

"No." 

"Onika... really. Just come with me."

She unbuckled her seat belt and got out the car. 

"Happy?"

"Yes," he responded holding out his hand.

They walked into the mall. Of course the it wasn't crowded because of the time and day they went. Drake began to pucker up his lips and that alone left hint. Whenever he did that, he was about to say something important or lengthy. But when they had walked passed all the stores and got ready to head out the other entrance to the mall, Nicki had become befuddled. Drake could see that in her expression but he left it alone. He then began to walk up some steps to the mall hand out roof of the mall.

"Look baby, I know you're still upset with me and it's okay because I know I should have been there with you and I let you down. But if you really want to know why I missed out, I'll tell you."

"Okay."

He took a breath which made her nervous. They were now about to hit the top of the steps.

"I didn't make it because I..." He then looked up to a specific part of the room.

"OH MY WORD!!! Stephanie... Oh my God. Hi," Nicki said embracing her while starting the tears. Her cousin she hadn't seen in years was in her arms.

"...was because Jelani and I went to pick up your cousin at the airport to surprise you," Drake continued as Nicki let go. She turned around and gave Drake a hug.

"Babe, I'm so sorry that I treated you like that. Stephanie, I'm..."

"It's OK Onika. I'm sorry too. This was the only flight I could catch but I wanted to come and spend time with the family. Sorry for the inconvenience."

"No, it's okay, it's okay. I was just caught up," Nicki admitted wiping her eyes. "Family comes first. Does auntie know you're here?"

"Yes, I spoke to her last night and this morning."

"Okay Stephanie, I'm glad you're here safely. Let's get out of here."

"Sure," she smiled.

"Wait... before we go... Aubrey, I'm sorry. This is exactly why I love you." She grinned and kissed his cheek.